Dreams & Things

All my life I really thought my dreams meant something. It might be because my dreams are so vivid it is hard to not think they do. They are so vivid even the good ones are really not good....if that makes any sense? Sometimes I get up in the morning and have a hard time shaking the actual dream and have to remind myself it didn't happen.

I dream a lot of my Gram which I think happens for a reason. I only dream of my Grandmother in ways that aren't very good. She is usually near death or in a bad situation. I don't know if this is maybe because I was the last person with her and found her dead or what. I use to want to dream of my sister all the time, and then it did happen. I dreamed I was at my Mom's home and I saw her coming through the backdoor into the kitchen. I was so excited and ran up and hugged her. It was then I realized I was the only person that knew she was going to die, but I couldn't tell anyone. Then the a car drove up she was actually killed in and she went to walk out the door and I watched her get in.

After that dream I realized I never wanted to dream of her again if that was how it was going to be. I had a couple other dreams with her in them but they were always of her as a toddler or preschooler but never her as a teenager. Then last night I dreamed about her last night again. It was again the same situation she was 15 and I knew she was going to die soon and I couldn't tell anyone. I was surrounded by my Mom and brothers. I was actually arguing with my one of my brother about something silly. I just remember being so upset because I wanted to warn Salenia or tell someone but I couldn't.

I also had another dream which involved a old friend that was.....ummmm I guess good. I actually get more confused by these ones then anything else. I guess I could justify this one by a few other things but still. I just can't understand why I dream so much of her. In this one I was dreaming about tattoo's too. She had tattooed a album cover on her chest. It was almost crazy because the tattoo was so beautiful and didn't look real. It was almost like 3D but so soft. Yeah I know that makes absolutely no sense what so ever! Sometimes it is good just to write some stuff down :)